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The Old You Has to Die: Breaking Agreement with Striving

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Let me be real with you — striving will wear you out. It whispers that you’re not enough, pushes you to copy everyone else’s strategies, and leaves you exhausted without fruit.

The truth? That voice isn’t laziness. It isn’t failure. It’s your old identity trying to take the mic. And she has to die so the daughter of God can rise.

If you’ve been wrestling with burnout and striving in your business, this post is for you. We’re going to unpack scripture, break agreement with old patterns, and step into the peace of who God already says you are.

Scripture Anchor:

Ephesians 4:22–24 —
​You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires… to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

Why the Old Self Can’t Come Into the New Season

The old self isn’t necessarily “evil” — but she is broken. She’s the version of you who hustled for approval, copied strategies, and tried to force outcomes in your own strength.

That old identity cannot carry the weight of your calling. She will always burn out, because she’s building from striving, not surrender.

How to Recognize The Old Self:

Let's connect Ephesians 4:23 to the characteristics of the old self directly to how they show up when someone is running a business, trying to build one, or waiting on God.

Each one will be broken down so it’s super practical and Kingdom-centered:
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1. The Insecure and Naive Identity

Lacking experience and confidence, the old self might feel inadequate or unsure of herself.

In Business:

• Doubts her ability to lead or make decisions, constantly second-guessing herself.
• She’s Overcompensated by copying what others are doing instead of seeking God’s unique strategy.

When Creating a Business:

• Compares her ideas or calling to others’ instead of trusting what God has called her to build.
• She Starts and stops projects due to fear of failure that overrides faith.
• She Saying “yes” to everything and everyone, stretching herself too thin.

When Waiting on God:

• Feeling like she’s “behind” and rushing ahead of God’s timing out of panic.
• Questioning if she even heard God correctly because doors aren’t opening yet.
• Seeking validation from people rather than resting in her identity in Christ.

2. The Self-Centered Motivated Identity

This self centered mindset often seeks power, approval, and comfort, leading to actions that benefit oneself, even at others' expense.

In Business:

• Making decisions based on profit only, not Kingdom impact.
• Pursuing titles, influence, or recognition over God’s purpose.
• Manipulating relationships, clients, or opportunities to get ahead.

When Creating a Business:

• Building something to “prove yourself” to others rather than out of obedience to God.
• Chasing trends instead of Kingdom assignment.
• Trying to control every outcome instead of surrendering to God’s process.

When Waiting on God:

• Praying for blessings but secretly wanting them to validate your worth.
• Feeling frustrated when God doesn’t move fast enough and attempting to “make it happen” yourself.
• Measuring success by likes, followers, or revenue instead of faithfulness.

3. The Negative Thought Patterns Identity

The old self is often associated with deceitful desires, darkened understanding, and a pattern of thinking that is not necessarily good or godly.

In Business:

• Thinking, “I’m not good enough; no one will buy from me.”
• Operating from scarcity — believing there’s not enough room, clients, or provision.
• Overanalyzing every decision until you’re paralyzed and never take action.

When Creating a Business:

• Believing the lie that God hasn’t called you or that you’re “not ready.”
• Assuming failure before you even try, which leads to procrastination.
• Distrusting others because of past wounds, which blocks collaboration and divine connections.

When Waiting on God:

• Letting doubt creep in: “Did I even hear God? Maybe this isn’t for me.”
• Feeling forgotten when others seem to be “moving faster.”
• Giving up on prayer because the answer hasn’t come yet.

4. The Resistance to Change Identity

The old self can be a source of familiar but unhelpful habits and behaviors that one tends to fall back on, especially when facing fear or insecurity.

In Business:

• Sticking with outdated strategies because they feel safe — even when God is calling you to pivot.
• Resisting delegation and trying to control everything yourself.
• Holding onto relationships or systems God told you to release.

When Creating a Business:

• Failing to step out of your comfort zone to launch, promote, or pitch your offer.
• Ignoring the Holy Spirit’s nudge to rebrand, restructure, or shift direction.
• Staying in jobs or industries God already told you to leave.

When Waiting on God:

• Trying to “help God out” instead of embracing the pruning season.
• Going back to old coping mechanisms like overworking, overspending, or overthinking.
• Resisting God’s refining process because it’s uncomfortable, even though it’s preparing you for the next level.

(This list is not exhaustive)

If you found yourself nodding through this list, take a breath — you’re not alone. These patterns don’t make you a failure; they reveal where God is inviting you into deeper healing and alignment. And I get it — I’ve been here, too. I actually lost my business and had a major financial loss because I didn’t know who I was in Christ. I was chasing strategies instead of standing in identity.

But when I finally slowed down and let God show me who He says I am, everything shifted — my clarity, my confidence, and even how I built my business. That’s why I created the Heart Check 7-Day Devotional — to help you pause, hear God clearly, and build from a place of identity, not striving.

The New Identity in God is Whole

God already calls you His daughter. That’s your reality right now, even if it doesn’t feel like it yet. Putting on the new self is like putting on new clothes — you may not feel at home in them at first, but over time, they fit because they were always meant for you.

How to Silence the Old Identity

1. Recognize Her Voice & Character​
The old identity says things like: “You’ll never get it right.” “Look at her business — just do what she’s doing.” “This is too hard. Quit now.”

When you hear these thoughts, pause. Recognize them for what they are: the broken self, not the daughter.

2. Break Agreement

Every time you copy someone else’s model without asking God first, you’re partnering with striving. Which puts a barrier between you and God. But thankfully those agreements can be broken. In Jesus Christ name.

Whenever you recognize patterns of striving associated with an old identity speak out loud, and say: ‘Lord, I repent and renounce striving in Jesus Christ name. I break agreement with striving. And I choose peace in Christ.’

I now receive your forgiveness and love in the areas where the sin of striving was in Jesus Christ name.

Take it a step further and take authority over it and command it to go under the blood of Jesus Christ. (Luke 10:19)

This my friend is spiritual warfare — and your words matter. When you do this you’re taking up new territory in your new identity that the enemy didn’t want you to know. As you walk through it stand on Ephesians 4:24 and confess it over your new identity every day at least for 90 days and say “I put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.” In Jesus Christ name.

3. Confess the Truth Daily​
Confession is a weapon. Speak who God says you are until it feels real. “I am a daughter of God. I am chosen. I build from peace, not pressure."

4. Practice Daily Renewal​
Identity is not a one-time revelation — it’s a daily choice. Every morning, choose to put on the new self through prayer, scripture, and confession.
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​Kingdom-Aligned Steps You Can Take Today

• Write down one identity-based confession from scripture and speak it every morning.
• Keep a journal of old identity lies you’ve believed, and replace them with God’s truth.
• Share your confession with a trusted sister in Christ who can hold you accountable.

Reflection Prompt

“What old identity patterns keep sneaking into my business decisions — and how can I break agreement with them today?”

Closing Encouragement and Your Next Steps

Friend, you don’t have to keep striving. The old you doesn’t get to run things anymore. God already calls you daughter — and He equips you to build from His peace, not pressure.

➡️If you’re ready to take the next step, grab my free guide 5 Scriptures to Break Striving and Rebuild Your Identity. It will help you create a scripture bank to silence striving once and for all.

➡️In addition start with the Heart Check with the Holy Spirit™. This is your season to break striving and build on God’s foundation.

📌 Join the community for encouragement, accountability, and sisterhood as you step deeper into your God-given purpose → ​Facebook Group Link​

🎧Listen to the latest episode, subscribe for more encouragement, leave a quick review, and share it with a sister who’s ready to break free from her old identity.

About Me + Brand Story Hi, I’m Idina—a Kingdom entrepreneur, Holy Spirit-led coach, and voice of truth called to help women heal, rediscover their God-given identity, and build with clarity and excellence. My story is one of surrender, faith, and resilience. I know what it’s like to strive for validation, tie myself to the wrong people, and face the pain of misplaced trust—even within the church. But God healed me, restored my voice, and taught me how to build from a place of wholeness and Kingdom alignment to build healthy relationships with Him and with others.